As a confirmed solo diner, I never plan to take anyone out for Valentine’s Day dinner — even though I eat out every night, including Feb 14. Still, I’ve seen how well or badly these dates can go from my perch at many restaurant bars.
That’s especially true of those who’ve decided to dine together on their first Valentine’s. It’s meant to be special but, as the traditional celebration for lovers, the occasion is fraught with meaning and the vexing overtures of destiny.
Throw in aperitifs, wine, desserts and other wallet-emptying options, and the stresses can be overwhelming, perhaps even romance-wrecking. Sometimes, the couple at a hard-to-get reservation can look terribly awkward, with conversation faltering and food pushed around plates not for lack of deliciousness but from anxiety-infused loss of appetite.
And still Valentine’s is one of the most difficult days to book. Restaurants love the holiday: In one US analysis, daily revenue rose more than 500%.
The occasion makes upselling — where your server subtly (or otherwise) pushes items on you to maximise the restaurant’s take — a lot easier.
It’s a necessary part of the food business — even if it can be annoying to customers who are hustled too hard or too crassly.
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The dish being promoted need not be the most expensive on the menu — as long as it’s the one on which the restaurant’s profit margins are highest.
You should always expect an upsell. Indeed, on Valentine’s Day, most restaurants deploy a revenue-maximising strategy: the special tasting menu. It’s for customers who haven’t had the time to consult the chef’s regular fare and instead pay for the convenience of a complete package.
But in many places, that’s not the end of the upsell.
A table could be wracked with doubt. Is this the right restaurant for the date? Is too much money or too little money being spent to commemorate the relationship? It’s tough enough when one party is picking up the bill; but imagine the transactional booby traps in store for Valentine equals who’ve had to negotiate satisfaction without actually negotiating. Verbalising these things can kill the vibe.
Amid all this, the restaurant sends someone to break the tension. With a warmth welcomed by the table, a server offers spoonfuls of caviar to garnish your first course — or if you want, every dish. Oh, you say to yourselves, how wonderful of the restaurant to give us such a lovely Valentine gift.
It’s not a gift.
I’ve had foodie friends — who should know better — succumb to this blandishment. The restaurant has made you feel simultaneously relaxed and entitled. Why shouldn’t caviar be part of the package? Oh, how special you feel. And the bill will be special too.
Upselling caviar benefits the restaurant’s bottom line. That’s because there’s a disconnect between the popular perception of caviar’s price and its actual cost.
Customers regard it as a hard-to-get delicacy. It’s produced by sturgeons — living fossils descended almost unchanged from ancestors in the Cretaceous period, which ended 66 million years ago.
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Traditionally, you had to kill the sturgeon to harvest its deliciously briny eggs; currently, the Western embargo has made Russian caviar scarce since Vladimir Putin invaded Ukraine (10 days after Valentine’s 2022). Other parts of Europe have been making up for the shortfall.
Restaurants are aware of the luxe appeal and charge accordingly. At the same time, chefs also have access to a marketplace disrupted by pretty good quality caviar from Chinese sturgeon.
Indeed, Kaluga Queen, based in China’s Zhejiang province, has a 35% share of the world caviar market. Nowadays too, there are ways of extracting the eggs without killing the fish. The increase in supply has led to downward pressure on wholesale caviar prices.
That’s compounded by its short shelf life: suppliers can’t keep roe in storage forever; eventually, it has to sell even if at a discount. Restaurants can make a nice profit from the markup.
Oh, here comes the wine list.
An experienced sommelier can skillfully guide you through the jungle of unfamiliar names, grapes and producers — and upsell you without upsetting you. I once asked for the wine list at a famous restaurant in Spain — and they wheeled out a cart with three huge volumes on it.
That’s when the wine flight alternative becomes attractive. It’s a taste of bottles paired to the dishes you’re about to eat. That’s often five half glasses (or less) at about the price of three full vessels. Pairings may be the better part of valour… I mean, value.
The trouble comes when you ask for the wine list and the manager or owner declares, “I am the wine list.” That demands a leap of faith; you’ll be entirely at the mercy of someone who can elevate prices if they somehow perceive you have deeper wallets.
Some diners may find it charming that a single person can have a restaurant’s entire wine inventory in their head, but it’s a real turn-off for wary people like me.
But that’s penny-pinching me. If it’s Valentine’s Day, you may just appreciate the convenience. Enjoy your company and the upsell. Just know that it’s happening.
And it’s often for the good: A particular dish may be the chef’s must-try specialty, or the wine may be a hard-to-find vintage that the restaurant managed to snag.
If you do enjoy Valentine’s Day at a particular restaurant, go back to sample what it’s like on a less emotionally fraught day. Learn from the holiday upsell to appreciate the skills of the business and its employees. There are things you should be willing to be upsold on. They could be what you’ll love forever.
Chart: Bloomberg
